The Great American Experiment: Family Style
In 1776, a group of visionaries gathered to make one of the boldest moves in history: they declared independence from the British Empire. This wasn’t just a political statement – it was the ultimate mic drop of the 18th century.
Now, I don’t intend to deliver a full history lecture, but the essence is this: they broke away from the motherland and embarked on a bold, unprecedented experiment in self-governance. There was no rulebook, no roadmap, and certainly no guarantee of success, only the looming risk of failure, which in those days could quite literally end in beheading.
Fast forward to today. As I sit on the couch, I can’t help but wonder if my son is ready for his own declaration of independence: college.
Is My Son Ready to Self-Govern?
My son is about to declare his own independence, minus any revolution, armed with just a dorm room and a Costco-sized pack of ramen. While there’s no need for an actual war (though you could argue we had some battles like the Battle of Room Cleaning of 2021), there’s still a transition of power underway. He’s forming his own “state of affairs,” and the big question on my mind is this: Did we raise him with enough values, resilience, and self-awareness to self-govern?
In other words, will he do his laundry?
From Founding Fathers to Floundering Fathers
With the original Great American Experiment as a backdrop, I’ve been reflecting on my role as a father. My wife and I worked hard to instill the foundational principles of honesty, compassion, a solid handshake, and the ability to make eye contact.
But now that he’s heading into the unknown, I’m suddenly wondering: Did we do enough? Or did I spend enough time with him? In other words, did we build a family version of the Constitution inside him?
Did All Dads On Deck live up to its mission?
Of course, I hope we’ve raised a young man who treats all people with fairness and respect and who is prepared to pursue his life, liberty, and pursuit of happiness, just as the Declaration of Independence envisioned – all while navigating the sometimes messy, always unpredictable world, bringing with it the need for amendments.
The Community Amendment
One thing the founders knew, and we parents should to, is that no one builds a nation (or a grown-up) alone. I’m grateful for the extended community that helped shape him:
- Teachers who believed in him
- Coaches who pushed him
- Friends who challenged him
- And yes, random people like an older gentleman who gave him a $2 bill while we were dining at a pizzeria. Our son was around 10 at the time, and to this day, he keeps that bill in his money clip.
Each one contributed a line to the Declaration of his Independence.
And Then, Reality Hits Like a Burned Dino Nugget
Just when I was starting to get emotional, thinking I had wrapped up my All Dads On Deck era with a lovely bow…My 15-year-old daughter walked into the kitchen and asked, “Dad, how do you use the toaster oven?”
Just like that, I was snapped back into service. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that some revolutions take longer than others.
Long live All Dads On Deck!
Final Thoughts
The Great American Experiment wasn’t perfect, and neither is parenting, all with no guarantees, minus the beheadings. But if we’ve done our jobs right, our kids will walk into their futures with the confidence, the strength to lead, and the wisdom to ask for help when they still can’t figure out the toaster oven. We have all the confidence in our hearts that our son is ready to write his preamble, and we are excited to watch it unfold.
So here’s to all the modern-day Founding Mothers and Fathers. Our work isn’t over, not by a long shot.
While reflection was my family value, add a comment on what might have been your family value? Describe it with your family and place it on your Family Values worksheet, downloadable as a free PDF on my site for free.
Share my story with a friend and ask them what their family value connection is.